Nuk's 20 Worst Singers of All-time..

[Nukleopatra]

Nuk's 20 Worst Singers of All-Time.

I don't know about you guys, but I feel like making fun of some really really bad fucking singers today. I mean, what good is a ''worst bands'' list without the ''worst singers,'' right? The singers listed here have little to no singing ability at all. There shouldn't be too much controversy, although my #18 will cause a big stink, I'm sure, since half the music industry has been kissing his ass from day 1. If you're senstive, you may want to skip #18 altogether, because even though he couldn't sing to save his fucking life, he was a fairly popular guitarist. Unfortunately for him, this isn't about guitar playing, it's about singing.

Note: Singers from the bands on my ''top 20 worst bands'' list will not be eligible for this list. Yes, Chris Martin is so bad, he is worthy of a spot, but who really wants to see a repeat from Friday? I've put together a fresh batch of awful. I would say that I've put more into this than just singing, but honestly, after I name these 20 ''singers,'' you'll realize, I didn't need to. Their singing was just so bad, decent stage performing and backing bands, couldn't hide the stench that spewed from their vocal cords. So, what's the difference between this list and the worst bands list? It's based on singing alone. As bad as ''Air Supply'' was as a band, no way does Hitchcock make a list like this, because he was somewhat talented in that area.

This is an all male edition. There's really no way to find places for the worst male and female singers, given only 20 spots. Dave wanted me to post my ''best of'' series, but lol, what fun would that be? And my ''most overrated bands'' list is just far too controversial for VSN.

I'll start shortly.​

 

[Nukleopatra]

#20

Michael Bolton.

What would you get if Rod Stewart and Barry Manilow had a love child together?

When Michael Bolton isn't busy ripping off other people's music, he's attempting to buy out their publishing house, to avoid paying them royalties. I mean, hey, it's hard fucking work ripping off other people's music, ya know? If any of you own a Bolton CD, or even one song, you should be ashamed. There's a 99.9% chance it's not even his fucking song, so go download the original, you asshats.

Oh yeah, he fucking sucks, too.

Positives: His future death.​

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oZGE-Y1C_nk"]YouTube- Michael Bolton - When a Man Love a Woman[/ame]

 

[Nukleopatra]

#19.

The ''Lizard King''.

Jim Morrison was disguising his lack of talent, by covering it up with as much controversy as possible. The Doors actually spent more time trying to keep this guy in check, than they did focusing on making the best music they possibly could. Most fans will insist that Jim Morrison made The Doors what they were, but if it had been up to Morrison, the Doors albums would have consisted of 12 minute poems about dead animals, incest and rape. But then again, Doors fans would have probably enjoyed that, since they considered him a ''lyrical poet.'' If by Lyrical poet, you mean a guy who had no singing voice at all, and spewed the worst possible drivel you can imagine, then yeah, I guess Morrison was a ''lyrical poet.'' I'm sure there's a singer or two more worthy of this spot, but the popularity that Morrison got, from doing absolutely nothing at all, is more than enough reason to add him here.

Some of you have been a bit harsh on The Doors, though. They were held hostage by Morrison and his fanbase, so there wasn't much they could do. They had to deal with shitty vocals, bad songwriting, and pretty much everything else that came along with Morrison.

Positives: ''L.A. Woman.'' Before Morrison's death, he did manage to make one of the greatest albums of all-time. This album shows what The Doors could have been, and may have been, if Morrison hadn't died. Did he really die while masturbating in a bathtub? Ahh, well, I guess he was just trying to get his creative juices flowing. 12 minute poem about masturbating, anyone?​

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PECk9A-07Pw"]YouTube- The Doors - Touch Me[/ame]

 

[Champ]

Im done with the list after you named Michael Bolton on the list.


Fuck you.

 

[Leftwich]

More Michael Bolton

 

[Nukleopatra]

Im done with the list after you named Michael Bolton on the list.


Fuck you.

Michael Bolton was so much better when his name was Otis Redding.

 

[Nukleopatra]

#18.

Jim Hendrix.

The most controversial pick on my list, since I'm sure most of you kiss this guys ass as much as the music industry. So, yes, I am about to go there. Let me just say, Jimi was a great guitar player, but this isn't about guitar playing, it's about singing, something he couldn't do at all. To best describe Jimi's ''singing,'' I'll use a quote from another web site.

''his singing sounded like a water buffalo giving off it's mating call while simultaneously yelping in pain from being lit on fire.''

Great guitar player, but when it came to singing, he had no ability whatsoever. Zero. None. Lucky for him, he didn't need to, because he had the whole guitar playing to fall back on.

Positives: Great guitar player.........most of the time.​

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OqQOaA2LPRo&feature=PlayList&p=7A20B67346800F0D&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=5"]YouTube- 1970 Jimi Hendrix - Foxy Lady[/ame]

 

[Pitty]

If Bob Dylan, Axel Rose, and Brian Johnson aren't on here, then, well, fail.

 

[Pitty]

#18.

Jim Hendrix.

The most controversial pick on my list, since I'm sure most of you kiss this guys ass as much as the music industry. So, yes, I am about to go there. Let me just say, Jimi was a great guitar player, but this isn't about guitar playing, it's about singing, something he couldn't do at all. To best describe Jimi's ''singing,'' I'll use a quote from another web site.

''his singing sounded like a water buffalo giving off it's mating call while simultaneously yelping in pain from being lit on fire.''

Great guitar player, but when it came to singing, he had no ability whatsoever. Zero. None. Lucky for him, he didn't need to, because he had the whole guitar playing to fall back on.

Positives: Great guitar player.........most of the time.​

You act as if he doesn't deserve it. The guy was a god.

 

[Nukleopatra]

If Bob Dylan, Axel Rose, and Brian Johnson aren't on here, then, well, fail.

Bob Dylan got a free pass.

And lol @ Axel Rose. Gun's 'n Roses had the worst fans of all-time. I won't insult the bad singers on this list, by even adding Axel Rose. I doubt VSN can handle my opinion of Gun's 'n Roses, so I'll just leave it at that.

 

[Pitty]

Bob Dylan got a free pass.

And lol @ Axel Rose. Gun's 'n Roses had the worst fans of all-time. I won't insult the bad singers on this list, by even adding Axel Rose. I doubt VSN can handle my opinion of Gun's 'n Roses, so I'll just leave it at that.

But Hendrix doesn't?

Dylan's voice is thousands of times worse than anyone on the planet.

 

[Nukleopatra]

#17.

Rod Stewart.

When Rod Stewart wasn't busy ripping off other people's music, he was attempting to...... Wait a minute, didn't I just do Michael Bolton a few minutes ago?

Rod Stewart suffers from the same disorder as Michael Buble and Michael Bolton. See, his goal is to rip off as many good artists he possibly can, and rip their music to shreds. The Rod Stewart of old, may have slipped by and not made this list at all, but see, that Rod Stewart no longer exists. It was okay when he was ruining his own music, but now he has to ruin the good shit.

Positives: Barry Manilow called, he wants his face back.​

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2oX2FSv4Rys"]YouTube- Rod Stewart - Have You Ever Seen The Rain[/ame]

 

[Champ]

Jimi Hendrix sound soo much better than Dylan
[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YF4-r2MpRMs]YouTube - Castles Made of Sand- jimi hendrix[/ame]


[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2-xIulyVsG8]YouTube - Bob Dylan - Subterranean Homesick Blues[/ame]

 

[Nukleopatra]

But Hendrix doesn't?

Dylan's voice is thousands of times worse than anyone on the planet.

Here's an article about Jimi Hendrix just for you... If you want the writers email, look me up, I'm sure you guys will have plenty to talk about.

''Here's a tough debate: which was worse, Hendrix's playing or his singing? I mean, on one hand, his singing sounded like a water buffalo giving off it's mating call while simultaneously yelping in pain from being lit on fire, while his playing sounds similar to a dull chainsaw going through an anvil, only less musical. I guess we have to file this mystery under "Unsolved" and call Robert Stack, because there's no way to ever measure which is worse, they're both that shitty. Anyway, the only good thing this loser did was die. It's truly a pity he couldn't have done that before entering the music field, thus saving everyone's ears from the torturous sound he produced. ''

 

[Pitty]

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yu0SQrAX9u0]YouTube - Bob Dylan - Like a Rolling Stone[/ame]

Lulz, people wonder why he was a song-writer first.

 

[Pitty]

Here's an article about Jimi Hendrix just for you... If you want the writers email, look me up, I'm sure you guys will have plenty to talk about.

''Here's a tough debate: which was worse, Hendrix's playing or his singing? I mean, on one hand, his singing sounded like a water buffalo giving off it's mating call while simultaneously yelping in pain from being lit on fire, while his playing sounds similar to a dull chainsaw going through an anvil, only less musical. I guess we have to file this mystery under "Unsolved" and call Robert Stack, because there's no way to ever measure which is worse, they're both that shitty. Anyway, the only good thing this loser did was die. It's truly a pity he couldn't have done that before entering the music field, thus saving everyone's ears from the torturous sound he produced. ''

Lol, you chose a guy who criticized not only his voice but also his guitar skills to quote. Nice choice?

That highlighted line is about the funniest thing I've ever read.

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sqzZUJN-jfI]YouTube - Jimi Hendrix - Little Wing[/ame]

Chainsaw going through an anvil...CLASSIC!

 

[Nukleopatra]

lol @ Pitty getting pissy because his hero had the singing ability of an 8 year old black boy, who had to have a person backstage to tune his fucking guitar, because he never learned how.

Moving on.

 

[Pitty]

lol @ Pitty getting pissy because his hero had the singing ability of an 8 year old black boy, who had to have a person backstage to tune his fucking guitar, because he never learned how.

Moving on.

Yes someone not knowing how to tune a guitar or read music and still being the best guitar player of all time is something to criticize.

I never said his singing was great, just that it was better than Bob Dylan. I bet I could find just about a thousand critics who think Dylan's voice is pretty bad. Not just one random nutcase.

Aaaaannnnnnddddd, we're done. When you stop using this site as a source talk to me.

http://www.nothing-sacred.net/articles/033/

(also lol at the site and it's 1992 Template, as well as, guess who, Bob Dylan at #3 while Hendrix is #4)

 

[Nukleopatra]

#16.

Fabian.

Johnny Rotten would have you believe that the Sex Pistols were the first ones to pull off the great rock and roll swindle, but that's not true. It was actually Bob Marcucci and Peter DeAngelis. Their plan was to cruise the streets, literally, in search of the most attractive, talentless kid they could find, to cash in on the whole Elvis thing. Insert Fabian Forte - a young, attractive, poor kid, who was in need of some quick cash, to help his ill father. It was actually quite impressive, because back then, it wasn't easy getting by without at least some talent. You can call them dirtbags, if you want, but Fabian doesn't regret a minute of it, and even still tours, always living up to the fact that he didn't have an ounce of talent.

Positives: Fabian had a killer backing band, allowing fans like myself, to pretty much ignore the whole talent thing​

.


[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ws3Xb7L3t5s]YouTube - Fabian - Turn Me Loose[/ame]

 

[Nukleopatra]

Yes someone not knowing how to tune a guitar or read music and still being the best guitar player of all time is something to criticize.

I never said his singing was great, just that it was better than Bob Dylan. I bet I could find just about a thousand critics who think Dylan's voice is pretty bad. Not just one random nutcase.

Aaaaannnnnnddddd, we're done. When you stop using this site as a source talk to me.

NS - The Top Ten Worst Bands of All Time

(also lol at the site and it's 1992 Template, as well as, guess who, Bob Dylan at #3 while Hendrix is #4)

I didn't bother looking at the site, or reading anything other than Hendrix.

Videos have been posted, even of Jimi Hendrix.. I think he even goes back stage for a minute to ask his buddy, if his guitar is sounding in tune. Check it out.