Dell's Pointless Lists Presents: The Way Too Late 2012 Movie Wrap-Up

[dell71]

Today we dive into what is probably the most fun category. Every year tons of kiddie fare hits the theater. Truthfully, much of it is annoying and overly simple. That said, when one of these movies gets it right it can be a truly wonderful viewing experience. The movies below got it right. Click on the titles of my nominees and honorable mentions to read my full reviews.

2012 - Best Animated Feature

The Real Nominees: Brave (Mark Andrews and Brenda Chapman), Frankenweenie (Tim Burton), ParaNorman (Sam Fell and Chris Butler), The Pirates! Band of Misfits (Peter Lord), Wreck-It Ralph (Rich Moore)

My Nominees


Brave
Directed by Mark Andrews and Brenda Chapman
Brave is a beautiful looking film. Beginning with our heroine’s expertly rendered hair, it’s a wonderful mix of photo-realistic scenery and cartoonish people. Nearly every frame has a touch or two that are a treat to lay eyes on.



ParaNorman
Directed by Sam Fell and Chris Butler
The characters on the screen are plenty scared, but their plight is handled with a good deal of levity. And the jokes actually work.




The Pirates! Band of Misfits
Directed by Peter Lord
Verbally, Pirates prefers subtly inserted punchlines to the obvious or crass. All of this comes together in a solid package.




Rise of the Guardians
Directed by Peter Ramsey
It’s possible to see the entire plot as a test of faith and what happens if we don’t have it. No, this doesn't get preachy and it’s not an advertisement for any religion. However, the theme is present. More than any of this, it’s just plain fun to watch.



Wreck-It Ralph
Directed by Rich Moore
There’s more to this movie than being pretty and loud. It eventually becomes a redemption tale. That much is expected. What’s not is the complexity of the redeeming and how many actually go through it.

Honorable Mention:
Ice Age: Continental Drift
Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted


The Real Winner: Brave (Mark Andrews and Brenda Chapman)

And My Winner Is...



Rise of the Guardians
Directed by Peter Ramsey
On the surface, things boil down to that good guys/bad guy stuff. That aspect alone is fun, but there’s more to it than that. It plays on our childhood hopes and fears to create both excitement and dread.

[dell71]

And now we've reached the last award. Sort of. As I've said before, I will do a best and worst movie list. For now, we'll tackle the people who have painstakingly brought their vision to life in the form of these pictures.

2012 - Best Director

The Real Nominees: Michael Haneke (Amour), Ang Lee (Life of Pi), David O. Russell (Silver Linings Playbook), Steven Spielberg (Lincoln), Benh Zeitlin (Beasts of the Southern Wild)

My Nominees:



Ben Affleck, Argo
It’s a masterwork crafted by Affleck, the director. For me, each of his three efforts from the special chair has been brilliant. He may have made his name as an actor and dater of starlets, but it seems his true calling is behind the camera.



Paul Thomas Anderson, The Master
Paul Thomas Anderson directs his movie in a manner that makes it difficult to look away from. The shots are beautiful and Hoffman and Phoenix command the screen. Many of their scenes together are scintillating. The director brings this out with excellent story-telling skills.



Ang Lee, Life of Pi
Including this one, I've only seen five of the twelve full-length features directed by Ang Lee. Until now, I’ve only liked one, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. If you shared my point of view, you’d understand why I wasn't really buying into the hype surrounding Life of Pi. However, I’ll admit that Mr. Lee has crafted a winner with this one.



Quentin Tarantino, Django Unchained
Nothing is so effective in the movie than at several points when we merely think something heinous is about to happen. This is when we’re intrinsically drawn to the edge of our seat while simultaneously trying to sink backwards into the thing. It is at these moments when Django is at its best.



Benh Zeitlin, Beasts of the Southern Wild
By the end, we've been through more than enough ups and downs with this family to become fully vested in them. When life throws yet another thing at them, we duck. Beasts of the Southern Wild is just a wonderfully done film.

Honorable Mention:
Kathryn Bigelow, Zero Dark Thirty
Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower
Ben Lewin, The Sessions
Sam Mendes, Skyfall
Steven Spielberg, Lincoln
David O. Russell, Silver Linings Playbook


The Real Winner: Ang Lee, Life of Pi

And My Winner Is...


Quentin Tarantino, Django Unchained
Taking another cue from the Blaxploitation era, director Quentin Tarantino wraps this tale about the barbaric ways of slavery in spaghetti western garb. To drive it forward, we get a screenplay chock full of sharp, often funny, often stinging dialogue. Django Unchained continues the director’s tradition of creating great tension through words. This one has more action between conversations than his normal fare, but the relationship between the two dynamics remains the same. Dialogue, complete with dramatic pauses, creates tension, action releases it.

[dell71]

I have a rule that I very rarely break. Once I start a movie, I'm going to finish it. No matter how bad it gets, or how late it is, even if I should fall asleep on it. Many times, I just couldn't keep my eyes open to watch a movie all the way through only to turn around and watch it in its entirety a day or two later. Even the bad ones.

Why subject myself to finishing a movie I already think is bad? It's simple, really. One of my core beliefs is what I call the law of opposites. We only understand something because we also understand it's opposite. We know what up is because we also know what down is. In movie terms, I can appreciate good movies more, because I know, or think I know, what bad movies are and vice-versa. I keep watching because there are always new levels of badness just as there are goodness. The cycle never ends.

Of course, we movie buffs like to cut those cycles into 365 day sections and grade each accordingly. I'll stick to that program. I'm just 200 and some odd days late getting the report cards out. When viewing this report card, note that the list does not strictly follow the way I scored these movies in my original reviews of them, which you can see by clicking on the titles (except for a couple of horror movies which I've yet to post reviews for). The way I feel about some movies evolves over time, some for the better, some for the worst. At the end, feel free to let me know if I've missed some horrible flick, or tell me how good some movie is that I've deemed terrible, or just share your own list. In my very humble opinion, these are...

The 12 Worst Movies of 2012



12. Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance
Spirit of Vengeance delivers precisely what its predecessor did: a fancy looking mess.

to be continued...

[dell71]

12 Worst Movies of '12 (cont'd)...

11. The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2
I’ll give some credit to the powers that be for wringing every last cent they possibly could out of this franchise…I mean not taking the easy way out and going an extra step. Disastrous it may be, but it’s a step.

to be continued...

[dell71]

12 Worst of '12 (cont'd)...

10. Mirror Mirror
Even the kids in the target audience are likely to have a “been there, done that” reaction to it all.

to be continued...

[dell71]

12 Worst of '12 (cont'd)...

9. Underworld: Awakening
Underworld: Awakening simply tries to hide its lazy writing with a succession of not-always-so-nicely-rendered battle scenes. That, my friends, should be punishable by two shots to the chest and one to the head with ultra-violet or silver nitrate rounds, depending on which side of the monster ledger you think we’re dealing with.

to be continued...

[LiquidLarry2GhostWF]

You're hitting these "worst of's" out of the park. Some straight booty 12-9, so far.

[dell71]

Worst 12 of '12 (cont'd)...

8. Battleship
I’m not sure anyone who has played the game could come up with enough of a storyline to justify a movie being made for it. Sadly, neither could the people actually involved in making it.

[dell71]

Worst of '12 (cont'd)...

7. This Means War
To their credit, the performers try valiantly to breathe life into this thing. As we all know, reanimating a corpse is impossible.

[dell71]

Worst 12 of '12 (cont'd)...

6. Tyler Perry's Madea's Witness Protection
Tyler Perry is back in drag, yet again.

[dell71]

Worst 12 of '12 (cont'd)...

5. What to Expect When You're Expecting
What to Expect is a classic case of a talented ensemble given nothing to work with and going through the motions.

[Palooza]

I'm SO sorry you watched the last three. Even I wouldn't sink that far.

[Houston]

Most of the stuff you praised Tarrantino for, gets credited to writing. I think Ang Lee hands down did a better job directing. Every individual thing about Life of Pi pretty much sucked but he pulled it all together and seemingly went above and beyond the script. Which was significantly..significantly worse than what Tarrantino had to work with as a director.

[SethMode]

I haven't seen Life of Pi, so I can't comment on that, but I loved Django. Although Houston's argument I think is pretty good, from a fundamental standpoint. If all you have is an Indian kid and a tiger, and you make it work (did he make it work?) that's impressive. I kind of refuse to watch the movie because I love the book too much.

Random question, I was really hoping two people would be playing Battleship in Battleship, or that someone would exclaim, at some point, that someone just sunk their Battleship (or if they want to be "clever" about it, someone just sunk their Submarine)...did anything like that happen?

[LiquidLarry2GhostWF]

Those last three are some real shit. Why would you watch some obvious terrible booty juice like that?