Dell's Good, Bad & Ugly Movie Reviews

[Buzzman]

Dell, I want your review of Revolutionary Road NOW. Please and thank you.

[The Buddha]

Truthfully, the story itself is remarkable. It's the telling of that story that isn't.

I think thats why i thought it was a good movie, i was so caught up in the actual story that they telling of it didnt really faze me.

[Palooza]

Dell, I want your review of Revolutionary Road NOW. Please and thank you.

Did you like this movie, Buzz? I thought it was too damn depressing. If I wanted to watch a couple fight over stupid shit, I'd hang around my parents.

[dell71]

I liked Juno, but I agree that the ending was a little bit too upbeat...as if Juno giving her baby away was just an everyday obstacle like doing your math homework. "OK, solved that problem...lets move on."

You didn't comment on Jason Bateman in your review. He was my favorite character. Dealing with the insane wife, being 'given' one small room for your stuff. I loved his comment to Juno when he's holed up in his room..."So, is this life appealing to you?!" Its funny what we think would be awesome as teenagers often ends up being ridiculous when we are adults.

Agreed, Bateman's character was awesome.

Dell, I want your review of Revolutionary Road NOW. Please and thank you.

Sorry, never quite got around to it. Still planning on seeing it.

[StealthShot]

What about the movie Moon.

[Buzzman]

Did you like this movie, Buzz? I thought it was too damn depressing. If I wanted to watch a couple fight over stupid shit, I'd hang around my parents.

Even though I obviously didnt live back then, but know quite a bit about it, I thought it captured the relationship between a husband and a wife in the 40s extremley good. And it was one of those movies that just grabbed my attention. It really was quite good for me. Funny thing though, I only watched it cause I was intrested in Leo and Kates 1st movie together since Titanic.

Also Stealth, for me at least Moon was #2 on my list.

[dell71]

What about the movie Moon.

Sorry to disappoint, haven't seen that one either. Keep your eyes peeled, though.

[Ralnakor]

Dell, I finally got around to watching Inglourious Basterds (in Blu-Ray no less), and I have to agree wholeheartedly with your review. I admit, I'm not a fan of Tarantino's in most cases (turned off Kill Bill after like 15 minutes, maybe 30 at the most, didn't exactly check), but this movie succeeded far more than it failed.

I absolutely would have loved more detail into the Basterds beyond Pitt's character. The one character beyond the Bear Jew I wanted more of was Til Schweiger's character, Hugo Stiglitz. Not only was he expertly acted (I lost it on his delivery of his last line before the shootout...I'm fighting as hard as I can to not reveal it and spoil the scene for those who haven't seen it), but there was such depth to what was a character who only actually spoke something like 4 lines the entire movie.

Well beyond that, I'm absolutely with you on the job Christoph Walz did with his role. Above all other scenes, I think the best part of his was in the opening. How casually and flippantly he discussed his nickname, all while politely drinking the farmer's milk had depth that is seldom seen today. His portrayal was both elegant and vicious at the same time, and was done so in a believable manner.

[dell71]

Teen Wolf
Directed by Rod Daniel
1985. Rated PG, 92 minutes.
Cast
Michael J. Fox
Jerry Levine
Susan Ursitti
Lorie Griffin
James Hampton
Jim McKrell
Jay Tarses
Mark Holton

Not so cool high schooler Scott (Fox) can't get the girl of his dreams and isn't too good at basketball, nor is the school team he starts for. Then, he discovers he's a werewolf and everything changes. This is a flawed but fun coming-of-age tale. It's story serves double metaphor duty. First, its pretty clearly an amped up version of puberty. Second, it also functions as a take on Fox's own career and what happens when unbelievable success is suddenly achieved. Fox was already popular as a member of the cast of the NBC sitcom Family Ties. However, he became one of the biggest stars in the world with the success of a little movie he starred in that was released about a month before this one called Back to the Future. Piggy-backing off that, TW was also a box-office hit, despite its problems. It is a bit hokey, even by 1985 standards. It also has some of the worst and most repetitive basketball sequences ever filmed. I'm not sure how much of that to blame on the choreographers or on the casting people since most of the actors seem to have never even heard of basketball, let alone played it. Still, it's fun like I said. Many of the jokes still work well and Jay Tarses gives one of my favorite small role performances of all time as Coach Finstock. Surprisingly, it's a bit raunchier than I remembered (I hadn't watched it in almost 20 years). Though its rated PG, I have to believe, if it were made today it would be slapped with a PG-13.

MY SCORE: 6.5/10

Teen Wolf Too
Directed by Christopher Leitch
1987. Rated PG, 94 minutes.
Cast
Jason Bateman
John Astin
Stuart Fratkin
Estee Chandler
James Hampton
Paul Sand
Kim Darby
Mark Holton

Todd (Bateman) is starting his freshman year at college on bogus boxing scholarship and is having a hard time adjusting. Then, he discovers he's a werewolf and everything changes. This is a case of Hollywood: A) trying to capitalize on something merely because it was profitable but not necessarily sequel-worthy and B) trying to manufacture a movie star. The latter happened because they, for whatever reason, didn't get Michael J. Fox to reprise his role. They settled on the next best thing, at the time, Jason Bateman, who was best known as a kid/teen actor having played recurring roles on several television shows including Little House on the Prairie and Silver Spoons. At least they were wise enough to make him a different character, he plays the Fox character's cousin. However, they still tried to fool us by having two of the characters from the original, Stiles and Coach Finstock (now the boxing coach at the college) played by different actors. Our stand-ins, Stuart Fratkin and Paul Sand, respectively, give woefully inferior performances. They did manage to get two holdovers to return, Mark Holton as Chubby and James Hampton as the dad...er...uncle. Sadly, neither is given as much to do, this time around. This story plays out almost exactly the same as the first movie, sometimes even using the same dialogue - not similar dialogue, the same dialogue. In short, it just switches out all the basketball games of the original for boxing matches making it feel more like a premature, ill-advised remake than a sequel. To its credit, the guys here are a bit more believable as fighters than the guys from the original are as basketball players. Of course, the question has to be asked, what college has a boxing team? The only other difference is Bateman's wolf gets to have more and wilder sex. Its not shown but it is heavily implied he has nightly threesomes with the two co-eds that hang around him. Strangely, they suddenly stop hanging with him for no particular reason at all. Well, to be fair, a couple of jocks made mean faces and said "What are you doing?" So they ditched him. Seriously. Anyhoo, fortunately for JB, his career was ultimately able to survive this catastrophe as he's developed into an outstanding character actor with many successes over the years.

MY SCORE: 0/10

[wingsfan77]

Hey Dell I was wondering if you've ever seen 'Donnie Brasco' ? I watched it about a week ago on Netflix and I really enjoyed it

[dell71]

Hey Dell I was wondering if you've ever seen 'Donnie Brasco' ? I watched it about a week ago on Netflix and I really enjoyed it

I love Donnie Brasco. Pacino & Depp were both great. Haven't watched it in a while, though - might have to.

[Senser81]

Teen Wolf Too was deserving of the 0 rating. As you said, there was no variation from the first movie. The plot was the same, the dialogue was the same, the "moral dilemma" of Teen Wolf choosing to compete as a human or a wolf was exactly the same, the choices made by the characters were exactly the same, and the outcomes of those choices were exactly the same. Even Rocky Balboa had to adjust ring strategy and occassionally get new trainers from movie to movie.

[nflman2033]

Female Trouble
Directed by John Waters
1974. Rated NC-17 (uncut version), 97 minutes.
Cast:
Divine
Mary Vivian Pierce
David Lochary
Mink Stole
Edith Massey
Cookie Mueller

The very strange life and times of Dawn Davenport (Divine). If you're at all familiar with John Waters, you know that the word bizarre only scratches the surface. His, is a truly demented world with warped sensibilities. After not getting what she wants for Christmas, 16 year old Dawn throws a tantrum, beats up her parents and leaves home for good. She has sex with the guy that picks her up while she's hitchhiking, literally on the side of the road, which begets a daughter she's forced to raise alone. She then embarks on a life of crime, has a stint as a stripper, marries her hair dresser and things really get out of hand when she tries to break into show business. Think about all these things and remember that Dawn is played by Waters' muse, 300 lb. female impersonator Harris Glenn Milstead, better known as Divine. To her, or his, credit if you didn't already know this, the illusion is maintained quite well, here and in a number of other John Waters' flicks. None of the acting is award show ready, or even fit for most B-movies but Divine is a force of nature that elevates the material to strangely mesmerizing levels. Waters' gift for shoving the proverbial envelope off the edge of a cliff to its bloody death has a charm all its own that also keeps you watching. You simply want to see what could possibly be next. And unlike many other movies of the era, Waters' films still have the power to shock and amaze. The passage of time has hardly dulled their edges. Combine that with the fact he shot on miniscule budgets and at that time was not quite competent in the technical aspects of filmmaking and you get something totally raw. He would go on to make more polished films such as Cry Baby, the original Hairspray and Serial Mom. I like to think of it this way: that creator of slightly perverse but palatable and often sweet goth, Tim Burton is like Dr. Jekyll and Waters' is Mr. Hyde, the id run amok. He's an inmate not content with merely running the asylum, he's hell-bent on burning it to the ground. Therefore, you don't enjoy this movie because it is good in the sense you would normally mean. You enjoy it because it is original, raunchy, appalling, told from a unique perspective (how Dawn is allowed to become a customer at the exclusive beauty salon is evidence of this), has a twisted sense of humor and is horribly made. Coincidentally, you may hate it for precisely the same reasons. This is why, for me, it's in the so-bad-it's-awesome hall of fame.

MY SCORE: -10/10

EDIT: Sorry guys, put the wrong score on there originally.

I take it you have watched Pink Flamingo's, if not you have to see it, and also Desperate Living, which is probably my pick for his early work.

[dell71]

G-Force
Directed by Hoyt Yeatman
2009. Rated PG, 88 minutes.
Cast:
Sam Rockwell
Will Arnett
Bill Nighy
Zach Galifianakis
Penelope Cruz
Nicolas Cage
Tracy Morgan
Steve Buscemi

Plot: A program developing guinea pigs and other small creatures into a walking talking spy unit is in jeopardy of having its government funding pulled unless they can stop an evil mogul from taking over the world.

The Good: The little furries are very well rendered and so gosh-darn cute. All the tenets of spy-team comedies are present. We have our hero type, and our wacky sidekick. Both are smitten with the only female on the squad. Then we have our techie...I'll stop here. I don't think I'm fooling anyone.

The Bad: Many movies have annoying characters and many movies are boring. Both of those problems plague this movie. The characters are annoying enough to make PETA supporters don furs. As far as the boredom it causes, its near fatal. In fact, I'm pretty sure Shakespeare must have watched this, or at least had me in mind whil he was writing. What does that mean? It means over the course of the 90 minutes I spent watching this movie I felt like I died a thousand deaths. Lest you think I'm just being way too grown-up and unwilling to have fun with a kiddie-flick I'll have you know my 9 year old daughter stood up about 30 minutes in, announced "this is boring" and left the room. I wish I had such guts. Spinelessly, I endured it with my 7 year old daughter who was only mildly entertained but holding me hostage, nonetheless.

The Ugly: Okay, I admit I chuckled a bit when Juarez (Cruz) had her emerging from the water scene.

Recommendation: Only watch this is you absolutely must. If that is the case, be sure to keep all sharp objects out of reach or you may be tempted to jam one in your own eye merely for the sake of having something interesting happen. If your kids want to watch it, load it in the DVD player and inform them it is really urgent that you count and label the strands of carpet in the another, then disappear. C'mon, an hour and a half of Disney baby-sitting won't kill them. I don't think.

The Opposite View: MaryAnn Johanson, Flick Filosopher

What the Internet Says: 4.9/10 on imdb.com (1/9/10), 24% on rottentomatoes.com, 41/100 on metacritic.com

MY SCORE: 0/10

[dell71]

The Thing
Directed by John Carpenter
1982. Rated R, 109 minutes.
Cast:
Kurt Russell
Wilford Brimley
Keith David
David Clennon
T.K. Carter
Richard Dysart
Charles Hallahan

A dog that appears to be running from the Norwegians who are stationed nearby shows up at an American research camp in Antartica. Shortly, the dog is discovered to really be some sort of shape-shifting organism that can perfectly imitate other life forms and tries to ingest whoever or whatever it copies. It doesn't rush us along from one killing to the next. Instead, it deals extensively with how the problem at hand affects the trust of the people who have to deal with it. This is where the strength of the movie lies. Still, it gets nasty when it has to through the use of special fx that have held up surprisingly well over the nearly 30 years since it first came out. That's mostly due to the fact that they're used sparingly. Unlike most movies of today, we're not constantly looking at some cgi concoction or another. We have organically made creature effects that we only see enough to creep us out. The only major drawback to the movie is that it plays like an Earth-bound version of the classic Alien. It's actually a remake of the 1951 move, The Thing from Another World. Either way, its an excellent sci-fi/horror experience.

MY SCORE: 8/10