ATB's Indisputable List of Baby Eaters

[A Tasty Burgerr]

First of all let me clear some things up.

Each of these players either currently, or at one point in their career, has eaten babies.

The list is not in order.

Baby eating capabilites have very litle correlation with actual talent or ability.

Unofficial parameters to determine whether one has a healthy diet of infants:
"Blackness"
Offensive Rebounds
% of points scored in paint
Size (or lack therof) compared to stereotypical player of that position
Girth
Tenacity / Ferocity
Toughness
When you see them do you believe they are capable of killing a man?

Of course, whether or not a player does indeed eat babies varies upon the individual.

OFFICIAL LIST
Ruben Patterson
Eric Hicks
Jason Maxiell
Marcus Camby
Reggie Evans
Ervin Johnson
DeJaun Blair
Ben Wallace
Adonal Foyle
Kenyon Martin
Theo Ratliff
Bob Lanier
Anthony Mason
Adrian Dantley
Joey Dorsey
Bill Russell
Danny Fortson
Kevin Willis
Horace Grant
Greg Ostertag
Larry Johnson
Artis Gilmore
Mark Eaton
Shaun Kemp
Rick Mahorn
Eric Dampier
Corey Maggette
Kermit Washington
Gerald Wallace
Kevin Garnett
Moses Malone
Darryl Dawkins
Dominque Wilkins
Marcin Gortat
Serge Ibaka
Deandre Jordan
Jayson Williams
Shawn Marion
Alonzo Mourning
Stromile Swift
Dennis Rodman
Xavier McDaniel
Kurt Thomas
Charles Barkley
Andrew Bogut
Dale Davis
DJ Mbenga
Patrick Ewing
Antonio McDyess
Matt Harpring
Michael Cage
Kendrick Perkins
Corliss Williamson
Moses Malone
Clifford Robinson
Harold Miner
Darko Milicic
Brent Petway
Clarence Weatherspoon
Bo Outlaw
Hakeem Olajuwon
Vin Baker
Bonzi Wells
Elton Brand
Chris Wilcox
Nene
Zaza Pachulia
Charles Oakley


Players may be added as they are recognized.

[Berowsk]

[DoubleDeuce]

[dell71]

Not having these guys:

Dennis Rodman
Michael Cage
Charles Oakley
Xavier McDaniel
Anthony Mason
Moses Malone
Cliff Robinson
Truck Robinson

= FAIL

[Argath]

lol @ D-League specialist joey dorsey

[Big C-Dub]

Sir Charles & Chuck Hayes come to mind

[goDawgs1433]

lol @ D-League specialist joey dorsey

Joey Dorsey scares the living shit out of me.



The look on the middle guy's face says it all.

[Kuzzy Powers]

Where the fuck is Charles Oakley?

I also lol'd @ Chris Kaman. I think id label him as more of a baby toucher.

Couple others:

Corlis Williamson, Kurt Thomas. I know him really forgetting someone here and I cant think of him.. will come back.

[A Tasty Burgerr]

Not having these guys:

Dennis Rodman
Michael Cage
Charles Oakley
Xavier McDaniel
Anthony Mason
Moses Malone
Cliff Robinson
Truck Robinson

= FAIL

I went through active players as I was making it, the former ones I have on there just popped in the brain as I was writing it.

I did have Anthony Mason though

[A Tasty Burgerr]

Significant improvements made regarding former players.

Some I was not sure about were Theo Ratliff, Larry Nance, and Elvin Hayes

[Pitty]

There is only one baby eater:

Unofficial parameters to determine whether one has a healthy diet of infants:
"Blackness"
Offensive Rebounds
% of points scored in paint
Size (or lack therof) compared to stereotypical player of that position
Girth
Tenacity / Ferocity
Toughness
When you see them do you believe they are capable of killing a man?

Blair owns every single one of those pal.

[Kuzzy Powers]

Get Vin Baker up on that bitch too. Here he is having trouble digesting a baby he just ate..



And you gotta credit my boy.. JYD.. dude was all over the boards in a ferocious manner. His teeth were made for eating babies..

[Kuzzy Powers]

Nobody quite eats babies like Detlef Schrempf either.

[Senser81]

Nobody quite eats babies like Detlef Schrempf either.

Tru dat.

Detlef shares a laugh with recently-retired Kurt Warner.

[A Tasty Burgerr]

Time for an update?