Catching Controversy | The Legend of Ethan Woy

[LopaKa]

i cant believe i haven't checked in on this yet. Great writing woy, keep it up!

 

[Woy]

Come on brah why does UM gotta be the team doing illegal shit? Make it a team no one cares about or no one likes. Like the Montana Hicks or some shit

Lol Montana? Then no one would care. :tongue:

Nah, the reason why I used Michigan is because they're a Big Ten team, Rich Rod isn't exactly an angel of a coach, and I could actually see him doing something like that.

I would have used someone like Ohio State, but no matter what, I could never see any of my CLs going there.

Yeah we got another update. Good one Woy. That just makes me want you to beat the shit out of Tussey even more.

Yeah I would have posted it earlier but I didn't get off work till late.

Woy is going to go Ron Artest on the whole Tussey's sideline, crowd and all.

That would be funny...we'll have to see.

Why does this have to be so good?

:jhenbeatkwon:

Keep up the great work Ethan. :thumbsup:

Dedicated followers like you guys give me the inspiration to churn out updates.

Ohhhhh Woy won't be able to play because he will be in troubleeeee!

Nah, IRL I could have done something similar like that and got away with it. Not a big deal.

i cant believe i haven't checked in on this yet. Great writing woy, keep it up!

Thanks Lo, glad to see you're following.

Nice update, and what dumbasses

Thanks man, and yes they are.

I'm typing the game update as we speak, but I'm going out this afternoon so I don't know when it'll be posted.

 

[Archer]

I think I'm in love with Woy

Anyways now thats off my chest , this is looking sick . Hopefully you are the next Pacman Jones since you like him so much :shifty:

 

[goDawgs1433]

how does woy have so many followers without being a post whore

The world may never know

I think (hope) this is sarcastic...but maybe, just maybe, he can actually write?

 

[Woy]

I think (hope) this is sarcastic...but maybe, just maybe, he can actually write?

I'm pretty sure that he is being sarcastic, but thanks for the praise Foster.

I think I'm in love with Woy

Anyways now thats off my chest , this is looking sick . Hopefully you are the next Pacman Jones since you like him so much :shifty:

You know I love you.

I don't like Pac-Man, you know that. Neon Deion FTW.

We wanna update! We wanna update! We wanna update! We wanna update! We wanna update! We wanna update! We wanna update!

You'll get your update in a bit. It's fucking huge, so I'm splitting it into two. First part coming soon, second part later tonight.

 

[Woy]

War (Part 1)

I walked back into the school right before the ball rang for physics. I met up with Brett and Brock and we started talking.

"Where were you first period Ethan?"

"Had to wash that shit off my truck and then I had to make a phone call."

"Probably Tussey kids fucked with your truck man."

"Yeah I guessed that. I got it handled though."

"Aw shit, what did you do?"

"Let's just say they had a nice announcement from the loudspeaker."

"Oh damn, how'd you manage to pull that off?"

"Let's talk about it over lunch. You guys want pizza?"

"Yeah man, sounds good."

I ate lunch with the twins and then after a few hours of sleeping at home, I got ready and got onto the bus to take us to Saxton. Like many bus rides, I fell asleep...

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"Just take the damn picture."

"Alright, alright. Smile, cause you're not going to smile when Tussey kicks your ass this year."

...

"Woy is so overrated. All-State? Yeah right, he won't touch the ball with me covering him."

...

"That team is a joke. You remember how bad we beat them last year? Oh I'm sorry, was it 35-7? Yeah that's right. Plus we're better this year, so it should be much worse."

...

"Mark it down - Tussey is a better team than Everett. Sure they lost star runningback Jordan Donaldson, but this team is better overall than last year's squad. Everett's better too, but not as good as the Titans. Tussey wins in front of a loud home crowd, 28-21..."

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"Fuck you Everett! Your asses are going down tonight!"

I woke up to the shouting of Tussey fans outside their school. They were throwing eggs and other stuff at the bus as some of the sophomores up front were flipping them off.

"Knock it off guys! Let's let our play do the talking."

Bill looked at me like I was high.

"Let our play do the talking? What the fuck have you been smoking boy?"

"Don't worry, I'm not going to follow my words. I just don't want any stupid sophomores ruining the beatdown we're going to put on these guys."

"That's the Ethan I know. Let's beat some ass."

"You know it."

We walked off the bus with more boos raining down at us. Some of the fans were shouting expletives, mainly directed towards me.

Once we got away from all the ruckus inside, I started getting ready. First the pants, then the team cut-off, my pads, high red socks, Nike gloves and red half-sleeves, and finally the white number 15 jersey. I sat there, staring at the floor, counting the seconds down in my mind before I went out to a loud and fired up Tussey crowd.

"I'm going to keep it short and sweet. They fucked with my truck, which means they fucked with all of your vehicles too. Enough about that though. We lost to them the last two years, and I sure as hell don't want to be oh and three against these fags! Brad, be on target all night! Cory, unleash some monster hits and break some fucking necks! John and Zach, run around, through, I don't care! Just get your asses into the endzone! I'll make my plays, don't you worry. Bring it to them every single play and leave it all out on the field! Now, who are we?"

"EVERETT!"

"I said, who the fuck are we!?"

"EVERETT!"

"Win on three! One, two, three..."

"WIN!"

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"And now the starting offense for the visiting Everett Warriors. At quarterback, senior Brad Swindell. At runningback, senior John Atherton and junior Zach Millin. At wide receiver, seniors Ethan Woy and Bradley Ewing..."

When my name was announced, the boobirds started coming from every direction of the stadium besides the home bleachers. I guess word got out of what I did.

Eventually the lineups were announced and the captains took center stage at the 50 yard line.

"Well look who it is. Like fucking with people's cars, huh?"

"Oh, I have no clue what you're talking about Woy. Nice announcement by the way bitch."

"Oh, I have no clue what you're talking about Swope."

"Shut the hell up man, just wait till I shut you down."

"Don't make me laugh."

The whistle blew and a flag went into the air.

*TWEET*

"Unsportsmanlike conduct on number 15 white and number 7 black. The penatlies offset. Now if you boys want to actually play in this game, then I suggest you shut up."

"Gotcha."

"Everett, heads or tails?"

"Heads."

He flipped the coin and it fell to the ground.

"Heads it is. Do you want..."

"We want the ball."

"Wow, that was quick."

He went over to the side to signal we were receiving.

"I'm coming for you all night Swope. You're about to be put on a 'how not to' video about playing cornerback."

"Whatever man, you won't get shit."

"Enough you two! Shut up and shake hands."

I didn't even look at their four captains and walked over to the sidelines. It was game time.

 

[Lumpkin]

just when I was all hyped up for the game:rockwoot:..... cliffhanger

Part two quickly please

 

[packersfan4eva]

just post the game already. i wanna know how he did

 

[Woy]

Oh wow. Ethan thanks he's hardcore. :rofl:

At least I can put the right word in my sentence. :rofl:

just when I was all hyped up for the game:rockwoot:..... cliffhanger

Part two quickly please

Cliffhangers are one of my specialities, you guys know that.

If he's that pumped for a high school game just imagine how pumped he'll be in college.

It's the biggest small-school rivalry in south central PA (more so in basketball IRL), so he's definitely pumped for this one.

Exactly, im expecting 2tds from you Woy at least

You'll have to see.

just post the game already. i wanna know how he did

Patience is golden my friend.

Woy is just an asshole. He is. (The poster Woy)

Ethan Woy is going to tear Tussey up like its Melyssa

I try to be. And lol at the last line.

Game coming up around 6-7 EST.

 

[Woy]

I'm not following anymore. :|

You will too, or I won't come down to VA to take you to a Pens game. :nana:

 

[Woy]

Like that would happen anyways....

Don't you ever underestimate me.

Game update coming up.

 

[Woy]

Putting the update on the next page.

 

[Woy]

War (Part 2)

"And with that kickoff return, the Warriors explosive offense will start at the 30 yard line."

Right away I wanted to go at Cody and Coach saw that. He called some pass plays for Brad to choose from his wristband.

"500 Houston on two! Ready? Break!"

"You're mine Woy!"

"RED, SET, ONE, TWO!"

I took a quick step forward and looked back on a hitch route. Brad threw a bullet to me and after catching it, I juked out Swope before being hit by a linebacker after a gain of seven.

"500 San Fran on one! Break!"

"One to nothing now Cody."

"Lucky catch."

"BLUE, SET, ONE!"

I took off down field on a fly route and Brad was only looking my way. The safety started creeping over as the ball started flying towards me. I jumped up...

*CRACK*

...and caught it as Cody and the safety collided trying to drill me. While running towards the endzone, I laughed as I saw both players yelling at each other, and then I pulled a little Neon Deion highstep towards the endzone. The officials weren't exactly my biggest fans and threw an unsportsmanlike conduct penatly at me as I jogged towards the sidelines.

"What the fuck was that for Ethan?"

"I scored, didn't I?"

"Yeah, but you also cost us 15 yards!"

"And the extra point is no good. Everett leads our Titans, 6-0."

"That better not come back to haunt us Woy."

"It won't Coach."

I started to eat my words because on the following kickoff, Dane Diehl found a seam and scampered 85 yards to paydirt. Their kicker made the extra point and it was quickly 7-6 Tussey.

The game continued to go back and forth most of the night.

"Touchdown Everett! Ethan Woy with another spectacular catch!"

"Touchdown Titans! They cannot be stopped!"

There were multiple late hits, face-to-face confrontations, unsportsmanlike penatlies, and personal fouls. I was putting on a show for the crowd, catching 10 more passes and two more touchdowns. However, everytime I would score, it seems like the Titans would always have an answer for us. With 20 seconds left in the game, we were down 31-28 and the Tussey faithful chanting 'it's all over.'

"Red double reverse, on set! Ready? Break!"

A running play? What was coach thinking?

"RED, SET!"

The quick snap caught the defense off guard as Brad handed the ball off to John. John took off around the left end and as the defense started to chase after him, he lateraled the ball to Zach coming around the right side. The defense was completely confused and by the time they realized who had the ball, Zach was down the sidelines with no one catching him.

"...the 10, touchdown Everett! Everett takes the...wait just a minute folks."

That little yellow object on the field had the Tussey fans breathing a sigh of relief and the Everett fans shaking their heads.

"Holding, number 63 offense."

Our entire team was stunned. Not only do we lose the touchdown and the lead, but now we're moved back 10 more yards and with only five seconds left on the clock, we needed a miracle to win.

"Guys I'm sorry. Leonard was just too quick coming off the edge. I was hoping they didn't catch that."

"Don't worry Bill, we can't hang this on you. I've thrown some picks too."

"Wait a minute! We haven't lost guys. Call the play Brad."

"Okay Ethan. Hail Mary on one, what a fucking surprise. Break!"

I jogged to the line and saw Cody grinning from ear to ear.

"What are you smiling about chump? I already got 12 catches on you."

"Scoreboard bitch."

He had a point there. I just shut my mouth and waited for Brad to call the cadence.

"GREEN, SET, ONE!"

The snap was a little high from Brett, but Brad caught it pretty cleanly. He started to drop back into a seven step drop as the four receivers took off downfield. Our fullback John McFarland held off a strong pass rush coming off the edge as Brad heaved the ball in my direction. Cody and I were fighting for position as Dane Diehl came over to help as the free safety. I jumped up as I took a hit from Diehl mid-flight...

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"Swindell is in the shotgun. He drops back to pass and avoids an incoming pass rusher. He has a man open down field, and it's Woy! He lets it go..."

I had my guy beat on a fade route but Bradley under-threw me. I came back and went up to bring down the pass but at the same time, a Claysburg defender went to lay a big hit on me. I just got my fingers on the ball when I left the collison...

"And it's incomplete. Oh no, looks like Woy is down. It might be his collarbone..."

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...and caught it with Swope on my back. I stretched my arm out as far as I could and waited for fate to decide. Second after second felt like an eternity as I nervously laid there waiting for the official's signal.

"No touchdown ref! You can't give it to him!"

Suddenly, it was like the ref's arms raised to the heavens above, as he shouted...

"TOUCHDOWN EVERETT!"

The Everett bleachers went nuts as some of them started to try to make their way onto the field. The entire team, from the ones out on the field to the rest of the sideline, started running towards me yelling in celebration. I jumped up as Cody muttered a small "fuck you bitch" under his breath while walking off the field.

"Now's when the fun begins."

I ran over to the Tussey sidelines, mainly where Chris was standing.

"Oh, what's this? Could it be the man who lost a shitload of money betting against us? I'm only 17 and even I know not to bet on high school games."

"Shut up Woy."

"You want me to sign this for you? It's going to be worth a lot of money someday."

"Just make sure you watch your back at all times."

I laughed and moved my way more down the sideline. Eventually I got to the bench and just stared at the crowd.

"You got your win Woy, what more do you want?"

"To make you and the community remember that you never fuck with Ethan Woy."

The boobirds got louder than ever as I continued to stare down the entire Tussey team as well as their crowd.

"Now that's booing to my ears."

Fans were shouting insults as loud as they can towards me, but I didn't care. I got them back, I got my win, and most importantly, I got back the respect I deserve. Not shown so much on the Tussey side, but when I looked over my shoulder, I could see the Everett fans giving me a standing ovation and hear a chant slowly starting.

"KING WOY! KING WOY! KING WOY!"

King Woy, huh? I could get used to the sound of that. Eventually I made my way to Melyssa.

"Great game baby. We're definitely going to celebrate this."

"Can't wait hun."

I gave her a kiss and made my way towards the rest of the team. After a half an hour of getting congratulations from family and fans, I made my way into the lockerroom. The local press asked me some quick questions and then made their way out. I slowly started taking my pads off as some of my teammates had a nice surprise for me.

"Gotcha good fucker! Party at my house!"

Bill took one of the small Gatorade coolers and poured it over my head. Shaking off the cold liquid, I smiled and thought to myself, 'is there anything that can top this moment?'

13 catches, 250 yards, 4 TD

 

[goDawgs1433]

Doubt it. Awesome game and win.

 

[Woy]

You better have gotten those 2 tds, and you got the win, so its a win win

Shit, you reminded to me to post the stats. Thanks.

 

[goDawgs1433]

250 yards and 4 TD's? Hot damn, son.

 

[packersfan4eva]

jeezus, great game. just consider indiana. he'd be getting passed to 90% of the time, and he'd be in the big 10.

 

[LopaKa]

another great write up from woy. glad to see woy get the win over tussey. I like his attitude haha.

 

[G-men]

you should go to rutgers. who wouldnt want jabu lovelace throwing to them?

 

[Lumpkin]

BEAST part 2 was worth the wait