MLB Random Thoughts [7/22 - 7/28]

[Villain]

Puig sucks.

Active streak of 3 multi-hit games right now. :deandre:

 

[Slateman]

Werth in 1996

Werth now



Hair Enhancing Drugs? Does MLB even test for that?

 

[RyanLeaf16]

Chris Archer throws another 2-hit CG shutout. This time against the Yankees. It's his 2nd CG, 2-hit shutout in his last 3 starts. Last time was two weeks ago against Boston.

The entire Rays staff is fucking people up right now. Once Cobb gets back, holy shit...rest of the AL may just be shutdown. I have not seen a run like this in a loooooooooooong time. I think it is something like 24-5 in the last 29 games and the starters have been going deep allowing the 'pen to just sit back and rest.

 

[Slateman]

Nationals had back to back homers today. It's the seventh time this year they've hit back to back home runs. They lead MLB in this category.

 

[Slateman]

Oh, he mad

 

[Slateman]

Oh, he mad

 

[Villain]

Werth in 1996

Werth now



Hair Enhancing Drugs? Does MLB even test for that?

I think there's some crazy story about him having a stalker when he was on the Dodgers.


Instead of finding an official story about it, I found this old post from DodgerBlues, which was the best YOYER blog before the writer got a real job:
http://www.dodgerblues.com/content/johnjohn/johnjohn_werth.html

John Candelaria is shaving in the Vero Beach bathroom. Somebody comes crashing through the door and stumbles into the wall. It is Jayson Werth and he pulls a baseball out of his glove to show that he made the catch.

John Candelaria: Hey Jayson. I'm John Candelaria. I was asked to interview you for the people at Dodgerblues.com.

Jayson Werth: There's a "Y" in my name. It's pronounced JAY-suhn.

JC: Isn't that what I said?

JW: No, you said Jason. My name is Jayson.

JC: Those sound exactly alike.

JW: But my name has a "Y" in it.

Werth walks up to a urinal. Candelaria chooses change the subject.

JC: You know, I played baseball with your uncle.

Werth looks toward the door of the bathroom and ignores Candelaria's comment. Candelaria goes back to shaving. Suddenly it registers with Werth.

JW: You know my Uncle Steve?

JC: No, your Uncle Dick. Dick Schofield.

JW: You know my Uncle Dick? From where?

JC: We played baseball together on the California Angels.

JW: You're making that up. There's no such team. You're a liar.

JC: Never mind.

Candelaria notices something suspicious about Werth.

JC: You didn't even unbutton your pants to pee.

JW: I'm not actually peeing. Just practicing my form. I'm a big leaguer now.

Werth leaves the urinal and walks to the sink. Along the way, he crashes into an air dryer.

JW: Oww, my ribs!

Werth falls to the floor in pain.

JC: I don't think you want to be down there.

Werth slowly gets up and moves to the sink to wash his hands. The water scalds him.

JW: Ahh, shit! Hot! Hot! Hot!

Werth jumps up and down in pain. He falls suddenly when he turns his ankle.

JW: I'm hit. Go on without me. Save yourself.

JC: You are a walking disaster.

JW: Hey, what was the deal with those funny hats you wore with the Pirates in the 1980s? They looked like little round cakes with stars on them?

JC: I dunno…they were just hats.

JW: Were they cake hats?

JC: No, they were not cake hats.

JW: If you still have one, I'd like a slice.

Candelaria walks to a urinal and starts to pee. Werth walks right up behind him and stands back to back with him. He puts his hand flat on his head and moves it across to Candelaria's head.

JW: You're tall. I'm taller than everybody else usually. You must be some kind of freak.

JC: Do you mind?

JW: Well, I'm not used to people being taller, but I suppose I don't mind.

Both Candelaria and Werth go to the sink to wash their hands.

JC: Let's talk about that stalker you filed the restraining order against.

JW: What stalker?

JC: A former ex-boyfriend of your wife claimed to have a video of you being unfaithful to your wife.

JW: I've never had sex with a man.

JC: I didn't say you had.

JW: Well I haven't.

Werth finishes washing his hands. He presses the button on the air dryer.

JW: Oww, my wrist! I bent my wrist back too far.

JC: You are one weird dude.

JW: I like to read "Nancy Drew" mysteries. I hear they're all about JD's mom.

JC: Uh, I gotta go. I'm need to, uh…meet Larry McWilliams for a game of Boggle.

:jonesy:

I miss that blog.

 

[Woy]

If the Cardinals lose tonight, please stop giving them national televised weekends. It would be the second time where they were on national TV for Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, and they were swept then by the Rangers.

 

[Slateman]

Jeter with the home run in his first AB back from the DL