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Just went back the OP, didn't know you reviewed The Damned United and In the Loop, two of my favorites. Great reviews too, although wish you would have liked A Single Man MOAR.
If you're not planning on it, you should check out Dogtooth when you get the time.Originally posted by mgoblue2290Comment
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Dogtooth was so different, I want to see your review of it so bad.Comment
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Dell's Classics Presents...
Inherit the Wind
Directed by Stanley Kramer.
1960. Not Rated, 128 minutes.
Cast:
Spencer Tracy
Frederic March
Gene Kelly
Dick York
Donna Anderson
Harry Morgan
Claude Adkins
Noah Beery, Jr.
Florence Eldridge
Local school teacher Mr. Cates (York) is arrested for violating a law that strictly prohibits teaching Darwin’s theory of evolution. This is Hillsboro, Tennessee, a deeply religious town where creation is the universally accepted belief with regards to how man came to be. This belief is so strongly and widely held that any other is both a legally punishable and spiritually damnable offense. The national media gets hold of the story, helping to start a firestorm around the small town.
In short order, two renowned lawyers descend upon Hillsboro, taking opposite sides of the issue. For the prosecution, and creation, is Matthew Harrison Brady (March). He believes the Bible to be 100% true, accurate, Divine Word. He also loves the sound of his own voice, delivering many a blustery speech. As reporter E. K. Hornbeck (Kelly) puts it, Brady is the only man who can strut while sitting down. The town loves Brady’s voice, too. They’re entranced by his bellows and treat him almost as if he were actually the Messiah.
For the defense, and evolution, we have Henry Drummond (Tracy). He’s a man for whom free speech, and free thought, is sacred. He recognizes their importance in the progression of mankind. Brady and the townspeople characterize him and his client as atheists. Whether or not Henry is opposed to God is something we’re asked to ponder throughout. What isn’t in question is that he is against the bigoted, narrow-minded beliefs espoused by many of the devoutly religious. He’s also opposed to blindly accepting every word of the Bible as infallible. He equates such behavior with not thinking at all. Is this enough for him to be accurately labeled a non-believer?
The two men go back and forth, as lawyers do. Henry is obviously swimming against the tide. Brady is not only going with the tide, he seems to be in a luxury liner. He’s quite literally preaching to the choir. It’s as if the entire fate of the universe will be decided by a race in which the only two participants are traveling in opposite directions.
When it’s all said and done, there’s still the question of who really won. More importantly, who lost? The verdict, and conclusion of the movie are both open to interpretation. Clearly, the movie appears to be one side over the other. Still, the end of the film is not a finale. It is the starting point to a conversation that may never end.
MY SCORE: 10/10Comment
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The Girl who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest
Directed by Daniel Alfredson.
2009. Rated R, 147 minutes, Swedish.
Cast:
Noomi Rapace
Michael Nyqvist
Lena Endre
Annika Hallin
Anders Ahlbom
Micke Spreitz
Georgi Staykov
After playing with fire, the girl with the dragon tattoo kicks the hornet’s nest. The hornet’s nest is really a super secret organization of cranky elderly dudes clinging to life with brittle, spotted hands. As gathered from the prior movie in the series, these guys protect our heroine’s father, a lunatic Soviet defector as a matter of national security. In an effort to maintain that secrecy, they actually do everything they possibly can to out themselves. Nice goin’, fellas.
Evidently, the one thing our bad guys believe will ensure that they remain safely in the shadows is locking up “the girl,” Lisbeth Salander (Rapace). Following the events of The Girl Who Played with Fire, she opens chapter three in a hospital bed after having a few bullets dug out of her. She’s also still wanted for three murders and now the attempted murder of dear old, psychopathic dad. “The Section,” as our wannabe clandestine and very grumpy old men come to be known, are trying to see to it that she’s convicted of these crimes. Meanwhile, super reporter Mikael Blomkvist (Nyqvist) attempts to ride to her rescue. He even guilts his sister (Hallin) into taking the case pro-bono.
The problems with this installment of the Millenium trilogy quickly come into focus. Here, we have a movie about a character who, over the course of two previous movies, has already proven she can be endlessly compelling. However, she’s not nearly as watchable when given nothing to do. She spends the first half of the movie confined to her hospital room while others work on her behalf. The latter half, she’s either sitting in a courtroom, or jail cell. In lieu of all the activity and intrigue of its predecessors, Hornet’s Nest treats us to long stretches of Lisbeth refusing to speak.
What we’re left with is a less than thrilling spy flick. Blomkvist is constantly chasing sources, or trying to get information to Lisbeth. The old guys make and botch plans. The gigantic blonde guy, whom we found out in Fire is Lisbeth’s half-brother, roams the countryside much like Frankenstein’s monster. For some unexplained reason, he’s kidnapped some woman, throws her out of a moving car and apparently goes back for her because he has her again, later. At least, I think it’s the same woman. Either way, it doesn’t matter because she just as inexplicably disappears. Sadly, none of this is particularly exciting to watch.
Viewing Hornet’s Nest becomes tedious work. The main culprit is something that happens way back in the first movie that we’ve never been allowed to forget for even one second. It provides us with such an overwhelming clue about how this is going to play out we’re simply waiting for it to be presented. Once it is, it can’t help be anything but anti-climactic.
Hornet’s Nest is a wasted opportunity. The promise was there for this to complete a great saga and catapult this franchise into the same stratosphere as some of the great cinematic trilogies. Instead of going out in a blaze of glory, it ends in a resounding thud. After two wonderful thrillers, we get a hybrid espionage/courtroom drama that’s not good at either. In the mean time, it’s best character, the one who’s fate hangs in the balance is pretty much made to go to her room like a child waiting for her parents to come to a decision about what punishment is to be handed out. Because of this, the movie drags and then reaches a conclusion we already figured out about ten minutes in. Imagine going to a basketball game, watching your favorite player drop 50 in the first three quarters and then be benched for the entire fourth quarter even though the game is still a close one. That’s the feeling this one gave me.
MY SCORE: 4.5/10Comment
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hey, another hornet...
The Green Hornet
Directed by Michel Gondry.
2011. Rated PG-13, 119 minutes.
Cast:
Seth Rogen
Jay Chou
Cameron Diaz
Christoph Waltz
Tom Wilkinson
David Harbour
Edward James Olmos
Jamie Harris
James Franco
Edward Furlong
Britt Reid (Rogen) is the “party all the time” heir to his daddy’s newspaper empire. He loves his dad, but doesn’t much like the old guy (Wilkinson). He is also suddenly put in charge when pop dies from an apparent bee sting. He recruits his father’s mechanic, Kato (Chou) to help him vandalize the statue built in dad’s honor and unveiled at the funeral. By the way, Kato is basically a combination of Q from the James Bond movies and Bruce Lee who, of course, played Kato in “The Green Hornet” TV series way back when. Anyhoo, while out cutting the head off dad’s statue, Britt and Kato find themselves stopping a couple from getting mugged, or worse, on the street. This provides the newly acquainted drinking buddies the impetus to don masks and try to clean up Los Angeles. Dubbed The Green Hornet after a pow-wow session at the newspaper, Reid and Kato soon draw the ire of Chudnofsky (Waltz), who controls the city’s crime and seems to be going through a midlife crisis. Chudnofsky also thinks the Hornet is trying to take over his business.
Let’s cut to the chase. If you’re a fan of the original TV series, this probably isn’t for you. If you take superheroes with any measure of seriousness, this isn’t for you, either. This is not Kick-Ass or Scott Pilgrim vs. the World which both ably spoof comic books and movies while simultaneously romanticizing them. Nor is this Iron Man with a clever, smart-alec sense of humor that fits the character perfectly. This is just goofy.
“The Green Hornet” has always borrowed heavily from the Batman franchise. However, this incarnation maintains none of what makes the Caped Crusader compelling. Here, Britt is merely a frat boy let off his leash. Even through to the end, he seems much less like a hero than a self-serving attention whore. I haven’t even mention how murder is pretty much a sport for him with the criminal backgrounds of the victims serving as his permission slip.
With all of that said, there still manages to be an element of fun to the proceedings. The jokes keep flying in, distracting us from the inferior comic book writing. Some are funny, some are not. How much you like Seth Rogen may determine how well the jokes work for you. A lot of mileage is gotten out of the inherent homo-eroticism of two men bonding over their toys while parading around town in costumes. There is also a lot made of Reid’s incompetence and the pair passive-aggressively competing for the girl (Diaz). Again, some of this works and some doesn’t.
As expected, our other distraction is the action. There’s more than enough to go around. Plenty of things blow up, lots of glass is broken and ample punches and kicks are thrown. The pre-requisite ridiculousness is present, really getting amped up during the finale. This makes it a surprisingly quick two hours. Still, if you dare compare it to other hero tales, it sinks like a canoe taking on gallons of water.
MY SCORE: 5.5/10Comment
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You should watch the movie Fat Head. Its pretty much anti Supersize me. The guy in this movie eats fast food for a month and loses weight, he does it by eating burgers and stuff too. It gets really deep with the info and he exposes how the food industry has pretty much lied to people for years.Comment
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Oh and I was thinking since you always do top ten list that you should do your favorite movies of all time, that would be pretty awesome.Comment
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My Twitch video link: http://www.twitch.tv/dave374000
Twitch archived games link: http://www.twitch.tv/dave374000/profile/past_broadcastsComment
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For Colored Girls
Directed by Tyler Perry.
2010. Rated R, 133 minutes.
Cast:
Kimberly Elise
Loretta Devine
Thandie Newton
Janet Jackson
Anika Noni Rose
Kerry Washington
Phylicia Rashad
Whoopi Goldberg
Michael Ealy
Omari Hardwick
Hill Harper
Three troubled women live next to one another in a walk-up apartment building. Crystal (Elise) has a live-in baby daddy that is just home from “the war”. Apparently driven crazy by his experience, he drinks all day long and slaps her and the kids around. Tangie (Newton) literally brings a different man home every night from the bar she works in, has a religious fanatic mom (Goldberg) that pops up from time to time demanding money and a little sister she can’t stand. Gilda (Rashad) is the least troubled, but tries her best to help the younger ladies and doesn’t seem to be having much success.
Very quickly, we meet some more ladies with problems. There’s Jo (Jackson), a magazine tycoon who is suffering through a bad marriage and some sort of health problem. If you’ve paid any attention to Tyler Perry’s previous work, you should figure out what’s wrong with her in about ten minutes. Kelly (Washington) is a social worker married to a cop and has a health issue of her own. Juanita (Devine) has a part-time boyfriend that moves in and out of her apartment at will, or more accurately, at the whim of his other woman. Then there’s Yasmine (Rose), the local dnace-teacher. She appears to be worry free. How long do you think that will last?
The ladies struggle with their issues and often have heart-wrenching moments. These moments will lead to many to hail it as Perry’s crowning achievement, artistically. That really isn’t saying much, but the point is taken. The director takes a more adult approach to his material and actually goes straight for drama. The bit of humor that is sprinkled in is much more derived from the human condition than his usual over the top slapstick. The overzealous attempts at comedy present in his other films never show up here. There are no buffoons in loud clouthing, no old people smoking weed and thankfully no signs of Perry in drag. What we’re left with are these women and their pain.
Their pain drives the movie. It’s the crutch Perry leans on, rather effectively I might add. This part is easy for him because he’s always had two things going for him. First, he knows his target audience. It is no secret that target is African-American females. He has a good feel for what moves them emotionally and how to concoct just the right amount of melodrama to rile enough of them up. Second, he always elicits strong work from his cast. Across the board, the performances are fantastic.
In For Colored Girls, Perry is a skilled illusionist. As one powerfully acted scene after another depicts painful occurrences he knows many in his audience relate to, all too well, the illusion is we’re watching a great movie. The fact is all thes wonderful scenes don’t quite gel into a cohesive unit. They’re short snippets of people, mostly women, pouring their hearts out quite literally through their tear ducts. Yes, there is lots of crying. The actors eagerly and earnestly attack their lines, leaving us and them exhausted from the effort. Unfortunately, the story the scenes combine to tell is predictable and uninspired man-bashing. Far in advance, we can see what’s coming. This stems from something the Tyler Perry canon is plagued by. It seems that in his world, Black men who aren’t the embodiment of pure evil are a rare commodity, except for the clowns of his other movies, of course. What happens is the scenes eventually devolve into a string of tragedies with hardly enough triumph to notice. To help us with this as much as possible, Perry eschews his normal all curing trip to church with another chick-flick cliché remedy, the group hug. Seriously.
As much formula is evident, there is some serious ambition with regards to dialogue. The first thing is the free-flowing of four, seven and twelve letter words that earn ‘R’ ratings. For most, this is not a big deal in any way. For Perry, it runs the serious risk of alienating his most ardent fans. Within the rather large and diverse population of Black women, the seemingly unshakeable core of his audience is those who regularly attend church. His work is seen as religious, with a secular slant. This brazenly flips the agenda.
The other risk is with how much he incorporates the source material. For those that don’t know, FCG is based on the play “For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow is Enuf.” Written by Ntozake Shange, it’s really a collection of poems centered around several characters. It had a pretty decent run onstage in the mid-seventies, even being nominated for the “Best Play” Tony and winning a number of other awards. I was intrigued going in because even though I’ve never seen the play, I have read it. Though that’s been long enough ago to forget most of it, I was curious to see how it could translate to the big screen. It’s a wonderful piece of writing that anyone interested in poetry should give a chance. Indeed, large chunks of Shange’s work are directly inserted into the screenplay. Characters talk normally, then suddenly break out in verse. Occasionally, this works to perfection as in the scene in which we’re treated to a cameo by Macy Gray. It’s perfect mix of persona and content provides us with a truly frightening two minutes. Other times, this tactic feels a bit off, or just plain odd. Still, I give him kudos for trying.
FCG is a most difficult movie for me to gauge. So much of it works, I’m tempted to join the ranks of those who swear by it. However, just as much doesn’t work. It reminds me I am a member of the “Tyler Perry Must Be Stopped” club. Approach this with guarded optimism.
MY SCORE: 5.5/10Comment
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The Teacher
Directed by Howard Avedis.
1974. Rated R, 98 minutes.
Cast:
Angel Tompkins
Jay North
Anthony James
Marlene Schmidt
Barry Atwater
Med Flory
Rudy Herrera Jr.
What happens when the person being sexually preyed upon is also a sexual predator? This, and many other intriguing questions probably should be asked, but aren’t even thought about in The Teacher. This movie only one thing its mind: being damned scummy. At this, it succeeds.
Our tale is about tail. That’s no big deal, lots of movies are. I’m not just talking rom-coms here, either. We’re stretching across all genres. The first Spider-Man told us right at the beginning that’s what it’s about. Even Avatar is essentially about tail. Sure it’s blue tail, but it’s tail nonetheless. In those movies, people take a more noble path to get some. What am I babbling about? Okay, I’m getting to the point.
The center of our universe is Diane (Tompkins). She’s a teacher, duh. Local psychopath Ralph (James) is obsessed with her on a level that would make John Hinckley Jr. proud. Google that name, youngsters. Ralph literally follows Diane around and spies on her all day, every day. He’s not terribly discreet, either. She’s well aware he’s usually hot on her…ahem…tail. She even tries confronting him on occasion. Oh yeah, just in case there was any doubt that Ralph is the villain, the movie opens with him staring crazily into a coffin he keeps at an abandoned warehouse next to the town pier. And he drives a hearse. Does he work in a funeral home? How the hell should I know? I just told you all we ever see him do is follow Diane. I can tell you what’s in the coffin, though. Among other stalker gear, he keeps a pair of binoculars to check out his girl while she’s sunbathing topless on her boat.
Let’s pause and talk about the boat. It’s a very nice boat. Not only does Diane own the boat, she owns a big house with a big pool and pushes around town in a shiny new Corvette. No wonder teachers are constantly bitching about money. Apparently, they were making a killing back in 1974!
Oh yeah, psycho, half-naked ladies, I didn’t forget. Mind you, even though she knows this creep is never more than two steps away, she seems to only take her boat out about 100 yards from the pier before she drops her top. Nice. Anyhoo, Ralph’s jollies are interrupted when his little bro shows up with a chum from school to take a gander at their favorite teacher in all her glory. I guess it runs in the family. Being discreet doesn’t, but Ralph hides from them anyway. Meanwhile, little bro and his buddy are brazenly watching Diane from the top of a staircase that runs alongside the building. Way to be inconspicuous, fellas. No longer able to stand the thought of another set of eyeballs ogling his woman, Ralph jumps out and surprises the younger pervs. Little bro is so startled, he falls a couple stories from the top of the staircase and dies. Distraught, or maybe not really, Ralph quickly blames the buddy for killing his brother. By the way, the buddy’s name is Sean. Sean escaping from a similar fate as his friend ensues.
Does Diane notice any of this? Of course not, even though it happens pretty much right in front of her. She’s too busy stretching her limbs, arching her back and otherwise finding ways to make her boobies jiggle and or protrude as per the director’s instructions, I’m sure. Obviously, she’s no help when the cops are trying to figure out how little bro got all dead and stuff.
Let’s get back to Sean. He’s not only a student of Diane’s, he’s a neighbor. His mom is also friends with her. Forget about Ralph, the real sleaze centers around this guy. It turns out Diane’s hubby just takes off and leaves her for weeks, even months at a time without even telling her to piss off. She’s quite the lonely gal, but she still rebuffs the advances of all the local studs tha come sniffing around. Very quickly, we figure out she’s got the hots for young, virginal Sean. You know how it is. She’s getting closer to her sexual prime, him to his. Yes, google sexual prime if you don’t get the joke. Anyhoo, the best part of all this is that Sean’s mom sets the whole thing up. She all but supplies condoms for her boy. Coolest mom ever, or worst, depending on your point of view. I mean, what kind of mother encourages the teacher to bone her son? Not mine, for sure. Apparently, she wants Diane to Sean the ways of love. Alright, to laugh at that joke you probably have to hear the theme song. During the course of the movie, I swear I heard it no less than 417 times. Honest. Anyway, the first line of the song is “Every boy needs a teacher”. Eventually, tells us that every boy needs a teacher to show him the ways…yeah, you got it. This means that the woman being stalked by the local freak is herself, a sexual deviant. Nice. Did I mention how sleazy this is?
I am getting way too into this. I can’t help it. The unintentional humor factor is high. Ralph is certain to pop up no matter where our favorite couple goes. Whenever they get a moment alone to have some sex, they do it in a way that it is obvious they did nothing of the sort. Oh, and Ralph’s watching. How about the acting? What acting? Production Values? Low. In short, it’s so bad, it’s awesome!
MY SCORE: -10/10Comment
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Wow. Two of the longest reviews you have written on this site so far and they are on mediocre movies. I have no clue how you do it. Reading the Colored Girls review, it seemed as if you enjoyed it, then at the end realized it wasn't such hot stuff. Fucking hate Tyler Perry and I am proud to say I have never had to endure any of his shit. In The Teacher, what happens to Ralph, you kinda just forgot about him or is that what the movie does as well? Does it really jut move away from that death? Sounds god awful.
Edit: Lately though, not just the last two, you've been killing it with these reviews. They go into detail without actually revealing much.Comment
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That was a great write up for FCG. I've gone back and forth about wanting to see it, especially since my mother and sister really enjoyed it - but like you said, they are exactly in Perry's wheelhouse.
"Sometimes I just want to be with my family and watch movie and eat some popcorn. But when I step on the mat I know there is no other place I'd rather be." - Marcelo GarciaComment
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Thanks. With the FCG review, there was much internal debate I tried to convey. With "The Teacher", I was just having fun. Tried not to spoil it for anyone but if you're curious without actually wanting to see it...
Thanks. Loving the Jim Kelly avatar!Comment
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