Dell's Good, Bad & Ugly Movie Reviews
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SHIT!!!
So I checked the internet last night for District 9 Showtimes. Of course, most of the theaters in the area have all the showings within 10 minutes of each other and they were all either too early or too late except one theater that had a 1:40 showing. I knew I had to be at a client's house at 12:30 but it was only going to be a 10 or 15 min appointment. This way I could high-tail it over to the theater & make to my seat just as the previews were starting.
Everything goes according to plan and I pull up to the theater at 1:35. However, when I stroll up to the box office I notice there is no 1:40 showing of District 9. They switched it to 1:10, like all of the other theaters so they could squeeze in the new Final Destination. The only thing starting between 1:40 and 3:00 was G.I. Joe, which I passed on (I'll either catch at the $1.50 theater in a month or wait for it to hit DVD).
Oh well, I might have some time Sunday morning or maybe try again next Friday.
BTW, matinee tickets at this theater is $7. Is it just me, or is that high? I'm used to paying about $5.50 for matinee.
Anyhoo, on to another review in my next post...Last edited by dell71; 08-28-2009, 02:34 PM.Comment
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I gotta a recommendation for you, I know everyone raves about Mickey Rourke in the Wrestler, but his best performance of alltime is in a movie called Barfly, fantastic job, good film, if it had been made in the 90's or 00's it would have gotten a best screenplay nomination as the writing is fantastic, however the academy in the 80's didn't give a lot to more independent films. however sadly good luck ever finding the movie i had to buy a bootleg version onlineComment
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10,000 BC
2008. Rated PG-13, 109 minutes.
Director: Roland Emmerich.
Starring Steven Strait, Camilla Belle, Cliff Curtis, Joel Virgel.
Plot: After a number of his people, including his sweetheart Evolet (the very pretty Camilla Belle), have been rounded up and hauled off by "the four-legged demons," D'Leh (Strait) and a few of his remaining tribesman set out to rescue them.
The Good: It was played with a straight face. There wasn't a hint of intended camp or satire anywhere. That's an amazing feat considering the vivid display of retardation splattered all over the screen. Other than that, it occasionally gives us some nice visuals.
The Bad: I could write a rather lengthy book on what's wrong with this movie if I hated myself enough to take on such a project. Its biggest sin is its too dull to make it "so bad its awesome." This just makes it painful to watch. In those enjoyably awful movies bad cgi adds to the fun. Here, it makes your eyes bleed. Some of it is good but inexplicably bizarre: giant ostriches, wooly mammoths in desert climates and a saber tooth tiger as big as a Chevy Suburban. To say it displays little knowledge of pre-historic creatures would be giving it a compliment. The storytelling is mostly incoherent. And I haven't even mentioned that the whole thing is derivative of the far superior Apocalypto.
The Ugly: If I could've seen the narrator, I would've shot him.
Recommendation: Watch Apocalypto. If you don't like it, please understand that this is still far worse. This may actually induce sudden heart failure. Well, maybe not, but I'm trying to discourage you.
The Opposite View: Michael Phillips, Chicago Tribune
What the Internet Says: 4.9/10 on imdb.com (8/28/09), 9% on rottentomatoes.com, 34/100 on metacritic.com
MY SCORE: 0/10Comment
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The only good thing about 10,000 BC was the main chicks blue eyes.....and those were probably CGI-enhanced too.Comment
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SHIT!!!
So I checked the internet last night for District 9 Showtimes. Of course, most of the theaters in the area have all the showings within 10 minutes of each other and they were all either too early or too late except one theater that had a 1:40 showing. I knew I had to be at a client's house at 12:30 but it was only going to be a 10 or 15 min appointment. This way I could high-tail it over to the theater & make to my seat just as the previews were starting.
Everything goes according to plan and I pull up to the theater at 1:35. However, when I stroll up to the box office I notice there is no 1:40 showing of District 9. They switched it to 1:10, like all of the other theaters so they could squeeze in the new Final Destination. The only thing starting between 1:40 and 3:00 was G.I. Joe, which I passed on (I'll either catch at the $1.50 theater in a month or wait for it to hit DVD).
Oh well, I might have some time Sunday morning or maybe try again next Friday.
BTW, matinee tickets at this theater is $7. Is it just me, or is that high? I'm used to paying about $5.50 for matinee.
Anyhoo, on to another review in my next post...Comment
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Also, I like how you avoided the minstrel show that was the twins in Transformers 2. That really made me upset. They had their funny moments, but it makes me wonder what the hell is wrong with Michael Bay.
I expect Scorsese and Ford Coppola to sneak ****** into their gangster films, but I can't understand the motive for the minstrel show. Not to mention killing the only black Autobot in the first one (Jazz got ripped apart). It's probably not on purpose. Quite possible I'm just paranoid.
Anywho, keep up the great work. I look forward to reading more of these. Not at all interested in D9, personally, but I'm very interested in Inglorious Basterds, in case you want my vote. :DComment
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I think district 9 has been my favorite movie that I've seen this summer. The only single party I wasn't so thrilled about was at the VVVEEERRRY end it starts to get a little predictable/cliche in the whole "root for the guy to succeed in his goal." fashion.Comment
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Also, I like how you avoided the minstrel show that was the twins in Transformers 2. That really made me upset. They had their funny moments, but it makes me wonder what the hell is wrong with Michael Bay.
I expect Scorsese and Ford Coppola to sneak ****** into their gangster films, but I can't understand the motive for the minstrel show. Not to mention killing the only black Autobot in the first one (Jazz got ripped apart). It's probably not on purpose. Quite possible I'm just paranoid.
Anywho, keep up the great work. I look forward to reading more of these. Not at all interested in D9, personally, but I'm very interested in Inglorious Basterds, in case you want my vote. :DComment
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Yeah Jason Statham is good when he is not in a full-blown action role like Crank, instead The BJ and IJ are roles I like to see him in.Comment
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