As a follow-up to last night's Keller's Take regarding Bully Ray calling a fan at the Chicago Impact TV event last week a "f-g," "f----t," and "queer," Dixie Carter and Bully Ray both acknowledged it on their Twitter accounts yesterday.
Dixie Carter (@TNADixie) wrote:
"Heard @RealBully5150 made inappropriate comments to a fan in Chicago. This will not be tolerated. Sincere apologies on behalf of TNA."
Bully Ray (@REALBully5150) wrote:
"Made an inappropriate comment to a fan in Chicago. If anyone was offended by this...I do apologize. No harm was meant."
What Dixie wrote sounds like a promising start. Saying it "will not be tolerated" and apologizing without qualification made it seem as if she sees this as more than a pesky annoyance from the P.C. Police.
Bully Ray, on the other hand, gave that classic apology that, I think to most people, translates to: "I can't believe I have to do this. I'm a frickin' heel who says controversial things. Get over it, you sissies, but if you were one of those pansy thin-skinned P.C. police who should probably be watching Oprah instead of pro wrestling, I'm sorry. No harm was intended, because I assumed you're all not all such delicate flowers."
Of course, I'm inferring all of that from his pithy, Twitter-conforming brief comments. I hope he finds time to clarify his position outside of the 140 character limit of a single Tweet on Twitter.
By the way, I can understand, to a very small degree, Bully Ray's frustration. He's a heel trying to get heel heat, he'd argue, so why should he care about hurting people's feelings?
Well, first and foremost, because his boss said "This will not be tolerated."
She has the good judgment and experience to know that saying those vile epithets in any context is going to cause controversy. Heck, look at the controversy for "Django Unchained" having the n-word in the script.
In that instance, though, the movie was intending to "depict a truthful representation of life in the antebellum south."
Also, TNA ain't Quentin Tarantino. Sorry. It's a modestly rated original cable TV series that blurs the lines between reality and fiction, but is marketed to families and not advertised as R-rated. It's stars post on Twitter using their on-air names and go in and out of character.
Even more so, though, it's all about context. There are very few places where calling someone "f----t" - whether they are gay, suspected of being gay, or obviously not gay - is going to be seen as the least bit acceptable. A movie portraying bigots being completely reprehensible people might be one context where you'd not just accept, but expect that word being used. A portrayal of schoolyard bullying in a movie might be another place.
In those situations, the viewer or audience member would know, based on context, that they might run into that word used in a certain situation - to convey the volatility of that word and the historical baggage that comes with it.
Like the n-word, the anti-gay f-word is linked to a lot of violence and dehumanizing verbal attacks over the decades. The idea that anyone at a TNA wrestling show, marketed to families including children, would want to be within earshot of that kind of language - especially in 2013 (although that's not excusing its usage in 1993 or 1973, either) - is crazy talk.
Dixie Carter knows how TNA positions itself in the marketplace. She knows, if she listed words on a sheet of paper that her TV stars were going to use in public while in character at TNA events and presented them to executives at Spike TV and Viacom or sponsors and licensing partners, "f----t" and "queer" wouldn't be presented on that list. She knows that would destroy her credibility with everyone she does business with that she would even think that word would be part of a heel pro wrestler's vernacular - at least a pro wrestler on a nationally televised show on a major cable network.
There are many ways to portray a bully. The cheapest, shortest, easiest, laziest way is to begin throwing around sexist, racist, anti-gay terms that have historical baggage that causes many people who have explored the real world just a little in their lives recoil.
To gay people, friends of gay people, family of gay people, sons and daughters of gay people, and decent people who can empathize with people who have been victimized by hate speech and words that tend to send messages to unstable bigots looking to pick on those who are weak and different than them, the word "f----t" is more than "just another word." It is scary.
People who say that word sometimes think it means gay people are such a threat, so different, so sinful, so unusual, so... whatever, that it's okay to pick on them, badger them, attack them, and sometimes even kill them. Using that word in almost any context in the real world says a lot about the person saying it. Even the most skilled of comedians tend not to use the word except to talk about how controversial it is to use the word, or to make fun of people (and themselves) for using the word in the past without regarding for how it affected those it originally targeted.
In Bully Ray's case, the fact that he thought saying it coincides with "no harm was meant" is absolutely ludicrous.
His only defense that I can imagine is that he meant harm, you know, because he's a heel and his goal is to hurt people's feelings to get heat or insult people so they boo him. Why in the hell would he use that word if not to cause harm? He said those words because he felt this annoying fan in the crowd that others on the roster also despised would be dehumanized by being accused of being gay in front of his family, friends, and hometown. Why else say it? It wasn't a compliment, it wasn't neutral (like, "Hey, you car-driving, food-eating, clothes-wearing human"). It was meant as an insult. In other words, if you're called out for being gay in public, you should feel humiliated.
Really classy.
But remember, in his apology he said: "…if anyone was offended by this." So it's not that he agrees it's wrong to say it and that he was reducing himself to the lowest form of cheap, lazy heel heat. He's only sorry "if anyone was offended." If no one was offended, well, he stands by the comment, even if it was deemed "inappropriate" by his boss.
Here's a good apology, one that I would have applauded Bully, or should I say Mark LaMonaco, for saying:
"Everybody needs to be held accountable for their bullsh--, me included. What I said was bullsh--. I'm embarrassed. I own up to being a total douche in this situation and I offer a sincere apology to anybody I hurt with careless words."
I didn't just make that up. That's what C.M. Punk wrote two years ago after he called a fan a "homo" and was recorded doing so by a fan camera.
Punk was a man. He didn't retreat. He didn't make excuses. He didn't hide behind the fact that he's an entertainer and part of a show. He said the truth. He was a douche. It was bullsh--. And he apologized for anyone he hurt with careless words.
That was redeeming and classy. It also, by the way, ended the story on Day One.
